Today I am continuing to reflect on last weeks' topic of "Your Armor of Light" and the importance of understanding vulnerability and protection spiritually. I have spoken about the metaphor of armor as a way to cultivate a consciousness of protection as we move beyond Covid-19 fear, cope with yet another variant and wrestle with global climate struggles and war.
A spiritual perspective give us a way to appreciate the natural protections of the human body; these along with the practice of prayer and the social protection of community (last week's posts) are components that can be nurtured and practice to lift fear, offer comfort, and live our lives with deepening peace. But there is still another factor to consider as a spiritual practice, removing the armor of a false sense of self. Chogyam Trungpa in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition writes of this with the idea of the Spiritual Warrior as one who's worldly armor has dissolved.
Here armor is seen as the hardened protection of our egoistic self, a wall of self-importance and self sufficiency. Armor in this sense then, includes the daily tension we carry around, defending ourselves against life, our own vulnerability, and the suffering of others (whom we unconsciously identify with). Vulnerability means the awareness that anything can happen, the recognition that human life is susceptible to injury, illness, and attack. It is not necessary the same thing as fear; fear is the emotional response to an awareness of vulnerability. All the defense mechanisms of the psyche and ego defend then against a realization that this separate life we claim as our identity, is false. Christianity has a similar stream of thought that urges acceptance of our human vulnerability, because it opens a spiritual door. St. Paul's confession of the 'answer' that came as he prayed to overcome his own unnamed vulnerability, sums up the idea: "But he (Christ) said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'” So here is an affirmation of vulnerability that is a reversal of the building up of the self image, that is sometimes taken to an extreme of worthlessness. But the point is not to fight the ego, which only strengthens it. Rather face life and yourself as what is, accepting fear, accepting mistakes, accepting lack of control and your feeling nature, including the need for others, for help. We take off the armor of separation, no longer defending the self, but not groveling, not shutting down. The "spiritual warrior" moves with open hand, open heart, tenderness, meeting life as it comes, without bravado or artifice. This is not something to force on yourself, rather it is recognizing this vulnerability is another aspect of the spiritual process. To move beyond the self is not to become all powerful-- just the opposite. It is: "I cannot do this, I cannot do this alone."
This is really two sides to one process. We let go of one kind of armor and gain another, again and again, until our sense of separation dissolves. Then armor is irrelevant. We are all somewhere on this line of living, and trusting life and ourselves, and each other. (Susan Nettleton)
Follow the link to a poem with the flavor of a spiritual warrior, by Jane Hirshfield