This Sunday as part of summer ease, I'm suggesting you take a Complaint Break. I cannot claim the originality of the phrase; it was coined by self-help author Shad Helmsetter in his book Choices (1990). His point, as many others have made, is that frequent complaining is a habit of thought (and feeling) that over time undermines our well-being and shapes a distorted, one-sided view of life. It also undermines relationships, since people tire of hearing complaints, especially if directed toward them!
Complaining may seem only natural, particularly in 2022 when it has become increasingly difficult to find sustained positive news, and conflict can seem the norm. Don't confuse complaining with assertive action or honestly dealing with problems in relationship and work, and/or with your own mistakes. The key words that distinguish positive response from complaint are "problem solving" and "action". A Complaint Break is about letting go of repetitive thoughts that dwell on mistakes, resentments and grievances, bringing us dissatisfaction and emotional pain. Letting go of our complaints, may well include the spiritual work of forgiveness.
Today's focus though, is on giving yourself a break from your own dissatisfaction with yourself, others, life. Paradoxically, you may discover several complaints that have already started taking root in your mind, because when we pull away from any habit of thought, that habit can chase us, pulling us back. So we don't judge our complaining today; we don't fight it or put our mind to confrontation; we are taking a break and letting life, situations, and people be fine today.
Tomorrow we may pick up the challenge of really taking a look at a sore spot of complaint, and set our sights on resolving it with the tools we know. Those tools include sitting with it in prayer and meditation, setting aside time to problem solve, talking it over with another and taking action as well as forgiveness. But today we just shift our thoughts to enjoy a day of peace and awareness of the gifts of life around us. We can do our best to avoid the complaints of others, to be compassionate or stay neutral or silent as best we can. This last day in July 2022, we can all use a complaint break. (Susan Nettleton)
For "No Complaints" by poet Nikki Geovanni: https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/90181/no-complaints
From our website:
https://hillsidesource.com/daily.../2018/6/20/complaints
https://hillsidesource.com/.../6/28/completing-the-complaint